My Radio

My attempts to channel what's playing on the many stations of my mind

Archive for the ‘Life’ Category

My Top 5 Greatest Basketball Shoes of All Time!!

Posted by and1grad on December 6, 2010

Whenever I see, or take part in, basketball discussions, I cant help but think of shoes. Particularly, the ones that I hold in high esteem..especially when I see some of what people wear now and how they’re either similar or different. As most people who hoop know, basketball shoes are not only like an investment, they’re damn near a relationship. You take care of them, they’ll take care of you. You can expect certain things from certain shoes…and sometimes “the grass is greener…” For some folks, what you wear on your feet can be indicative of what you might be on the court. Better make sure the statement you’re making, is the one you’re attempting to make…or all might be lost as soon as you step into the gym and/or pull your shoes out of your bag.

So, for your viewing pleasure, these are, IMO, the best basketball shoes EVER:
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Posted in Life, Relationships, Sports | Tagged: | 3 Comments »

Happy Birthday Dad

Posted by and1grad on November 30, 2010

Just want to start by sending a Happy Birthday shout to my Dad on his 60th birthday. Thank you for being a great example to follow.

“If I have seen further it is by standing on the shoulders of giants.” — Sir Isaac Newton

Hope everyone had a great, or at least eventful, Thanksgiving. Mine was cool. Had my parents come up to the house and hosted them for a few days. Hosting parents seems to get harder & harder as you get older. It seems the more you have, the more they expect. Anyway, I’m sure a number of you had a moment where something was said, by a family member, that absolutely floored you. This was mine. Read the rest of this entry »

Posted in Life, Relationships | Tagged: , | Leave a Comment »

The Influence of Culture (part 3)

Posted by and1grad on October 18, 2010

In the last 2 blogs, I’ve talked about the establishment of societal norms, how I believe they came to be societal norms, and the apparent impact of the evolution of gender roles. I mentioned how this impact seems to be especially illustrated in the Black family/community. In the Black community, we’re seeing more single-parent households than the norm and we’re also seeing more of our successful Black women remain single for longer than they probably should. I believe the evolution of gender roles plays a part in this due to the fact that they are no longer clearly defined. A man isn’t clearly going to be the breadwinner anymore and its up to both genders to learn how to deal with this possibility. Its not as simple as saying, “Yeah, it wouldn’t bother me if that were the case” because most likely, it will…to varying degrees of course.

I left off with the simplest of questions, “what’s the answer?” Plenty of answers have already been visited upon by numerous “relationship experts.” Think like a Man. Act like sheep. Blame White women. Date inter-racially. The list goes on and on. I cant offer you a simple answer. If I knew it, I damn sure wouldn’t be offering it up for free on a blog. I’d take my talents to South Beach. Here’s one thing I AM comfortable telling you though. Stop listening to “experts.” No one is an expert on you but…you. Imagine that.

But if you’re REALLY hurting for a piece of advice, here’s what I tell people. Somewhere in your life, in the present or past, you’ve stumbled across a couple that looks like they have what you aspire to have. Might be a close friend, an acquaintance…might even be your parents. I call them “relationship role models.” Ask them why their relationship works. Emulate some of what they do. If that sounds crazy to you, ask yourself what it is you did to become who you are. More than likely, you had a role model that you used as something of a blueprint to success…or at least as a way to avoid failure. Why wouldn’t relationships work the same way?

But hey, that’s just one man’s opinion. I am not an “expert”…*Big Pun voice* but I know a lot.

Posted in Black, Dating, Life, Relationships | 1 Comment »

The Influence of Culture (part 2)

Posted by and1grad on October 13, 2010

In my last post, I talked about the impact of biology on societal norms. These biological influences created a society where certain gender roles became established and are prevalent as a “social norm.” Men are the providers, women are the nurturers. The formula is simple…or it used to be. In our current culture, the ability to provide for your family is directly proportional to your ability to amass wealth. This is usually done by obtaining a skill that you can put to use either for yourself or for an employer. These skills are varied and the amount of wealth you can obtain by developing/displaying are just as varied. The established gender roles provided a framework for how families functioned, which influenced how communities functioned, etc. The flaw in the design is that the framework was set up so that it would be limiting to women and minorities, affecting the ability of their families to provide for themselves. People needed to evolve.
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Posted in Gender, Life, Relationships | 1 Comment »

The Influence Of Culture

Posted by and1grad on October 12, 2010

What actually IS the spectrum of cultural influence? What is the impetus that drives societal norms and are those norms solely the result of cultural influence? I find that these questions seem to be consistently answered the same way whenever I read about the impact of societal norms on the population, at large.
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Posted in Gender, Life, Relationships | Leave a Comment »

Marital Considerations

Posted by and1grad on July 20, 2010

Found us a Reverend

With the last post, I talked a little about why I think women, far moreso than men, want to get married. I sincerely believe women are what drive the practice of marriage, as most men would, more than likely, be perfectly fine as just a partner/companion. To be clear, this isnt to say that men dont want to be in exclusive relationships…but the need for it to be a “marriage” is minimal AT BEST. But it isnt as though women are the only ones that benefit from marriage.
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Posted in Life, Relationships | 9 Comments »

Why is marriage so important to women?

Posted by and1grad on July 19, 2010

When the ring means everything...

Reading WisdomIsMisery’s post, on Single Black Male’s blog, entitled “Why Men Dont Commit” got me to thinking about what may be an obvious question that I rarely see asked…”Why is marriage so important to women (as opposed to men)?”
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Posted in Life, Relationships | Tagged: | 24 Comments »


Posted by and1grad on July 15, 2010

I was listening to some Reflection Eternal this morning, which if you dont have RPMs yet, you sleepin, and this particular song called “In The Red.” Kweli spends most of the song talking about the sometimes inevitable fall from grace that our “stars” suffer. These lyrics really struck me:

“Shame how our heroes is broke, we call em stars;
Thats because when they falling to earth, they falling hard…” — Talib Kweli Read the rest of this entry »

Posted in Celebrity, Life | Tagged: | 6 Comments »

Men are from Cali, Women are from NY

Posted by and1grad on July 13, 2010

Yes, I did decide to keep that title in the realm of the Continental US. I am not an Astronomer. With that, Lets get started. Read the rest of this entry »

Posted in Dating, Life, Relationships | 22 Comments »

Oscar Grant trial: A realist’s perspective

Posted by and1grad on July 9, 2010

Involuntary Manslaughter was the correct verdict. There will be a lot of reactionary commentary that will try to feed you other stuff such as racial injustice, etc. Dont be fooled. It was the only verdict that could have actually gotten a conviction. Read the rest of this entry »

Posted in Black, Life | Tagged: | 15 Comments »